Father’s Day Blues

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Father’s Day is this weekend.
While this is a joyous time for some to celebrate their father and all that he does, that’s not the cause for my household.
It’s more like a storm cloud looming over until Monday begins. It’s one of the few times my daughter really acknowledges her father’s absence in her life. She can’t seem to find the answers to her questions.
Like “Why doesn’t daddy love me?” or “How come daddy never sees me?” or “Why am I not important enough to be in his life?” For a mother those are some tough questions to be asked and even tougher to come up with a legitimate answer.
It’s not distance. He lives and works roughly 25-30 minutes away.
We don’t do drama so there’s no problem there.
He pays child support so he has rights there.
Despite all that, she can count on one hand how many times she’s seen him and the last time was more than 3 years ago. She’s nine now.
I honestly believe that if he walked past her on the street she wouldn’t even know it was him.
They say every girl needs her father to teach her lessons her mother can’t.
I hope my daughter learns from the lessons her father has taught her with his absence.
I hope she learns that it’s not okay for a man to make you feel inadequate or unimportant.
I hope she learns that it’s better to let someone walk away and be alone than to keep someone around and feel unwanted/unloved.
I hope she learns how important it is to watch who you have children with.
I hope she learns that if a person wanted to spend time with you they would. With that being said, don’t make someone a priority when you’re only an option.
I hope she learns that despite what someone does or doesn’t do she can always count on herself.
So I don’t agree that every girl needs her father.
Because some fathers don’t deserve the awesome little girls they have.
I’d rather her have a man in her life that loves and cares for her unconditionally and shows her every chance he gets. Someone who treats her as if she was his flesh and blood.
A man that gives her a reason to celebrate Father’s Day instead of dreading it.
I’m Just Saying.

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